Friday, February 25, 2011

335) my epiphany


the literary life 2/25/11

So last weekend I had an epiphany: in a nutshell, it is that the world is magical. Sounds hokey, I know, but I felt it intensely, ya know? I felt it like a wave rising through the perfunctory clamor of my mind and soaking up everything negative. I believe in magic. I believe in the power of positive mind. Yet this week has challenged me with its surprises and hurdles. With its blush of busyness. There have been moments when I feel my faith being tested, when others disappoint me, when my wishes, small or large, don't come true. There have been moments of too much noise and negativity when I feel like the magic's waning. And then this simple thought occurs to me: girl, don't take it personally. People say and do things out of their own emotional landscape and experience of reality. Often, their speech and actions have little to do with me. And so I continue to dream. And hope and wonder. This week, a friend of mine did a medicine card reading for me. She arranged the four cards in what is known as the butterfly spread. The cards affirmed this sense of magic, but highlighted the necessity of letting go and patience. So this is what I think: I think we exist in a snow globe. When we shake things around, the flakes begin to twirl. When we enter the imagination, reality loses its hold. What happens outside the snow globe can't crush the flakes. The flakes are always there, twirling in magnificence. And yet we suffer. And yet we suffer again and again. And yet the road is long and dark and often uphill. But like an ant, I'll take it slow. Like a flake inside a snow globe, I won't let go. I believe in synchronicity, and I think the world is conspiring to lead us to specs of beauty, if we'll only put our faith in it.

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